When Sapna reached out and said that she was interested in being interviewed we were so excited. Not only does she have an amazing blog, but she also expressed how much she loves what we’re doing with our blog (flattery will get you everywhere, obviously!). Once we read Sapna’s answers we were even more excited. Each of her answers are so thoughtful and helpful to moms everywhere. She has such a unique perspective of motherhood from raising her three children in several different states, while also making sure to keep them aware of her Indian culture and her husband’s southern traditions.
As always, we are so thankful to be able to welcome Sapna into our Mom of Fame. Please leave her some love and help her realize how much she deserves to be there! Also be sure to check out her blog by clicking on the link below!
Tell us a little about yourself and your family.
Hey y’all! My name is Sapna and I’m a pharmacist turned stay at home mom of 3 beautiful, smart kiddos. I grew up in Atlanta, GA, but my parents are of Indian descent. They moved to America shortly after they were married to provide a better life for my brother and I. I consider myself to be Southern as I have spent the majority of my life living in Georgia. However, my parents did a great job instilling Indian values and culture in me. My husband is actually Caucasian, which makes our children mixed. It’s important to me that I pass on to my children the values and culture of my Indian heritage, as well as the Southern traditions of my husband’s family and my childhood. I recently started a blog about what its like raising half-white, half-asian children in America. I write about everyday mom issues, tips and tricks, and resources for helping Indian Americans raise their children. I also added a sort of book club as I’m an avid reader, and I’m working on lots of yummy recipes coming soon! Check it out at www.southerndesimommy.com, and follow me on Facebook!
What is the best piece of advice you were given about motherhood? Did you take it? Would you give that piece of advice to someone else?
The advice to “ignore what everyone thinks motherhood should look like and just do it your way” was the best advice I’ve ever received. It’s easy to get all flustered and feel like your failing when all you see around you are so called stepford moms with their perfect bodies and perfect babies, who have all their ducks in a row. For me, motherhood is far from that. With my 3 crazy kiddos we take things one day at a time, but we always have fun! Our house is a mess, and I haven’t brushed my hair in a week. We hit up the gym regularly, and I try to make sure we do at least one fun kids activity daily. My advice to you is to just focus on what makes you and your family happy and healthy – that’s what’s most important.
How is motherhood different than you imagined it would be?
Motherhood is a lot lonelier than I imagined. I guess I figured all moms were somehow automatically great friends, but it turns out that’s not the case. We have moved multiple times since having children, in fact, all 3 of our children are born in different states. It’s been really tough trying to meet other moms who have kids of similar ages and to connect with them socially. Being a working mom with my first 2 kids made it even harder. After my 3rd child was born, I was able to stay at home with the kids, which has given me so much more time to interact with moms groups and go on play dates, etc. I’m still working on it, but I think I’ve finally found a group of great ladies I can relate to 🙂
What are your three strengths when it comes to motherhood?
1. I’m a planner and I like to be prepared. I plan our meals, play dates and activities for the kids, and I always have snacks/drinks in my van and on my person. Hell hath no fury like a hungry toddler.
2. I’m good at going with the flow. When our plans are interrupted by some unforeseen complication, I’m pretty chill. I stay calm so the kids stay calm while we think of a way to solve the issue at hand and get our day back on track. Problem solving is an important skill I want to teach my kids. It’s imperative that they learn to handle a “bump in the road” because life in the real world is full of them!
3. I love my children, unconditionally and with all my heart. No matter how crazy they make me or how many times they’ve had to go in time out, at the end of the day I make sure they know that they are loved no matter what.
Describe a time where you were completely overwhelmed as a mother.
When my second daughter was born we had just moved to a new state. It was December and we now lived in Wisconsin. We hardly knew anyone there, and had no support system. Being new to the crazy winters of the north, stuck inside with a 2 yo and a newborn, plus postpartum depression made for a terrible combination. I also had to return to my full time job after just 6 weeks. I felt so guilty dropping my girls off with a nanny while my husband and I went off to work. It turns out the nanny was horrible, and my newborn developed positional plagiocephaly from being left on her back all day. Thankfully we were able to get a bazillion second opinions and it turned out she did not require surgery. It was a ridiculously stressful time. I cried, ate my feelings, and cried some more. I survived, but I’m now convinced that hell is cold, dark, and lonely – not unlike the winters of Wisconsin – no offense to all you northerners out there 🙂
Is there anything you feel that you have lost about yourself since becoming a mother? What have you gained?
Oh my, I have lost my body, my mind, my sleep, and all personal space – I can’t even go to the bathroom alone, haha! But in return I have gained endless love and joy, and oh so much laughter! My kids are my reason for living and I’m so thankful to them for reminding me of all the little things in life that are so precious. I cherish all the moments we’ve shared and the memories we’ve made over the years.
What do you want your child(ren) to learn from you?
I hope my children learn to love unconditionally and to be kind to others. I strive to make love and kindness a priority in my life and I hope that they will see that and learn from it. In this day and age what they say is true, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love.”
If you would like to read more about the struggles of raising bi-lingual kids check out Sapna’s blog post about it here.